De Pulchro et Bono

Sayers of the nonchalant subneutral theoria: compilation number 3: now.

Pullulate before now:

FYI

;)

i was like this at 13 pretty much i was JUST qettinq into partyinq and druqs and falinq school im 16 now and im the same pretty much ppl say that this life is so qreat its not the "fun" dont even stay 4 lonq you dnt relize what you done till its like to late i mean i wasnt as bad as them doinq coke an shit i only did weed and pills and drink but most my friends did that your life is like a lie the hole time ALWAYS indenial yeah is not a life to live

Gristlemania '87

I know that officially we don't 'do' puerile viral comedy copypasta in these parts, but I just c-can't help myself. Perhaps this contains some motivational tips for Faceplant personnel:

Review Notes: Jonty Tiplady, "Zam Bonk Dip" (Barque, 2007)

It happens that the door swings by the lamp's hook barely.

Weep to see the white girl in the rubber mask. The black girl in socks. The white girl in socks. The black girl in the rubber mask. The zipped sock. The unzipped sock. The rubber mask.

There are four socks.

Swap.

The early prince licked her all over.
Sailor Milan had fits or something like this
and said I cannot even tie a bow.
He could not pick up a two penny piece either.
The other two came back in the second film
and the key for the suitcase in the tarmac
drew new water out. [Tiplady, "4"]

Meat, greens, talc, unzip. Sweat through the joypad: declining to dinosaur, tractor, train. Blue duplo stuck to his thigh when he stands to go. Biplane.

NOW COMPARE: Anon. "Tom O'Bedlam", from "Ancient Songs" (1790)

Whimpered affirmations of the desk and bird. Extrusions slendering and dainty through the preventative come cropped, basted, Jeepsie.

Wildered in the pungency of an alp, sleeping with a gallant boy, the weeping door indicates no exit. Some minstrelsy in his bald chin who cried to see our shaving, residually. Unmasked, no socks.

Gameplay: 90% Graphics: 85% Sounds: 95% Addictiveness: 94%

RE: "MAINSTREAM" POETRY

My favorite thing about this video:



Is that it has less than half the number of hits that this video has:



Are YOU big in Romania, Armitage? Are you FUCK.

urgent

really urgent.

RR

SFBG Most of the trains in the film are freight trains, there are maybe only one or two passenger trains.

JB There are two: one was a commuter train, one was a passenger train. The amount of commuter travel, at least on the West Coast, is minimal — you hardly ever see a train with people in it. Amtrak leases the right to use rails from the companies that operate the freight trains. I've taken most of the Amtrak train routes. They're fun ... and slow.

SFBG How long did you shoot?

JB I shot for two and a half years, probably. I had so much fun that I didn't really want to stop. I still miss it. Sometimes I go back to those same sites and wait for trains, just to have that feeling again.

KLIT INFIDEL

FACEPLANT LONDON MEET: THIS WEEKEND?

Dearest DOPE, APE, JOW:

I will be in your LODNOD TOWN this weekend, staying at the palace of COMRADE KNIFE FIGHTS, and wondered if you'd all like to meet up. Perhaps we could do something like this:



Let me know yeahyeah.

Review Note: Tim Atkins, "Folklore" (Salt, 2008)

THE MATCHBOX CREW -interlude

for all one of you following the riveting saga that is THE MATCHBOX CREW

( part 1 here & part two here )

i just wanted you to know that the exciting conclusion will be coming as soon as i get back to my writing bunker located on earth's single moon

so keep your drawstring pants on &stuff

- fleas / pants

I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS

Dear "FRIENDS",

Are you trying to hurt me? Sure, we've had our ups* and downs** since this site took flight, but never has your negligence to alert me to matters of great significance left such a devastating break in my heartskin, my neck which connects passion to gravy. I am OF COURSE referring to THIS: knowledge of the existence of TWO POEMS by BARACK OBAMA, which I should have seen coming anyway since "Barack Obama" is a PERFECT ANAGRAM of "Frank O'Hara".

When and how will you mend me?

Your frenemy,

DOPE.

* More like YOU've had MY ups.
** i.e. September

ATTN: NOOBS

$%^&@#(@&!!!!

IF you have any time you're looking to murder, why not go HERE.

IF you can get past level 16, please screenshoot me the solution.

THX THX THX.

That Sarah Palin interview in full

ALIENATING IN-JOKE POST #004

DOPE!

Whatever you do, don't click here!

Revoked Cynicism.

Yo, that previous sketch was web-smart geek chic compared to the American media's attempt to explain the credit CRRRRUNCH. No? Jon Stewart's noticed the same thing, with dominoes.

High Psychedelic Performance

listening to la monte young in the army.
hoover tripe
Ju/'hoansi metal
this man walking, 1:40

Review Notes: John Cheke: The Hurt of Sedition (1549)

What grinds your face in the toothed slit is exactly what keeps the at bay looted. So what, when the door slides back to the yellow desk and she's not looking:

But what meane ye, by this equalitie in the comune welth? If one be wiser then an other, wyl ye bannyshe him, because ye entende an equalitie of al thinges?

Sure, only, there's no use opening your office door any more given the concentrations;

The thing ye take is not your ryght, it is an other mans own, the maner of takyng against hys wil is unlawful, and against the order of euery good commune welth, the cause why ye take it, is mischeuous and horrible, to fat up youre sedition, ye that take it wicked traitours, and commone enemies to all good order.

Debris, cylinder, the cogency of an eel. There is a woman violently over it, totally gaped, no mustache:

Now ye gentlemen be more in trust be cause the comunes be untrusty [...]

Brick, luxury wife, dependency, thin cones of optimist phut about a bank. Yeah:

Ye haue spoiled, enprisoned, + threatened gentlemen to death, + that with such hatered of minde, as may not well be borne, ye case thereof I spake not on, which tried wil happeli be not greate, but se ye thinge, set murder asyde which is ye heinostest faute to a pryvate man. What could more spitefulli haue ben done again them, then ye haue used with crueltie? Can this do anye other but brede in their stomakes gret grudge of displeasure towarde you + engendre suche an hatered as the weaker and the sufferer, must nedes bear ye smart thereof.

The desk is in that room. She is a kind of resin. Conferring about a kind of fact with one ear like feat.

6/10

REDUCTIVE BOX OFFICES SMASHING

like everywhere

I KNOW what you're thinking BUT IS IT REALLYRILLY SO BAD TO FRAMPLE YOUR SIT-DOWN-UPONS?

ergo my balls, jeff daniels

DAMMIT

I just spent ages trying to upload a .gif animation I made of a rotating PCP molecule interspersed with the image of George Trakl vandalised with lime green wingdings, but FUCKING BLOGGER kept converting it into a distinctly NON-animating .jpeg which is all but fecking useless to me.

*SIGH*

It is difficult to be a white 23 year old living with his parents these days.

I tried uploading the .gif to Imageshack but they were complete JERKS about it. I finally got it working, thanks to another image hosting service, but only then did I get to the realisation that the whole enterprise sucked anyhow, so I deleted it and wrote this instead.

Friends: I am tired of ironic WTFing. I would really like to contribute to an internet worth saving but I can't even imagine what one would look like. Would anybody be interested in launching, right here, a Faceplant Symposium upon matters such as these?

Friends, show us your internets; I want to touch yours.

Miffed stick figures

Oh Gee Capitalism Is Collapsing How Irresponsible Of Everybody OH SHIT I Guess Everyone Is Just Out For Themselves & They Don't Really Care About The COMMUNITY;
The Subprime Primer

Cake

Let Them Eat It

ELSEWHERE ON THE NETWORK #041

As well as breezing thru vanquished albatross daily, spaffing at the larynx everyday too, you, like "me time", gaze at the dashboard longingly. This is not your home-fried menagerie bap coated in hammers, nor your time to shine. Nova prospect, your fridge is hooked up and touching its purpose, yet all the same you bark on, lounge under punches all roughed up. What the fuck happened to you?! >> Shit we didn't get up to this week includes:

• This thing about Sonic cumming/shitting/vomiting in our mouths.


• This thing about smuggling cocaine in a giant squid.


• This thing in which "much placenta, much abdicated play" froths around the living room, you buy a mouthwash but everyone laughs at you anyway.
  
• This thing, in which we wonder if our American frat boys would be so kind as to confirm whether such behaviour is encouraged overseas (?- really).


• This thing we saw on Youtube.


• And this thing, in which a camera tripod looks a bit like a face, because you can't not use pictures like this when they come along:

IN SUMMARY: 4/10.